Crossing Fingers!

I got a call today from the school. I have an interview tomorrow at 2:40. I also now have a terrible case of the nerves. I HATE interviews. But, I REALLY want/need/gotta have this job!

Cautiously Optimistic...

So times have been more than a little trying lately.  I've been stuck in a rut of my own creation, and for a while now have not been able to see any hope of escaping it.  I've never had a great sense of direction, but I don't recall a time in my life where I have been so lost.  I lost my sense of self, who I was, what I wanted.  And when you can't find yourself, don't know where you are,  it's virtually impossible to navigate life with any sense of purpose or direction and find your way to your desired destination.  You kinda have to know where you're coming from to know where you're heading.

Depression is an ugly, hateful creature.  It can turn even the brightest of moments dark, eradicate all traces of hope, and leave you  wandering aimlessly and alone in the void of a desperate, desolate existence.  I've always felt that the worst kind of lonely is the loneliness you feel even as you walk amongst friends and loved ones.  The self-perceived isolation, the feeling that no one can understand the depths of your despair, the however irrational feeling that no one cares... It's rough, to put it most mildly.  Reason and logic seem to fly out the proverbial window, and you're left with tiny pieces of who you used to be, and an outlook on life that is remarkable in both its pessimism and downright inaccuracy.