Forgive Them Father, For Republicans Know Not What They Do

This is a comment my friend Tony posted in reply to an earlier blog of mine. I had to share it with everyone because it is too funny! I think we can all agree, Tony is well on his way to redemption, as the first step toward recovery is always admitting that you have a problem. Now I'm going to work on forgiving him for his terrible electoral transgression.



Forgive me Father, for I have sinned. It was before the Presidential elections that I last confessed.

"What are your sins, my son?"

I'm truly sorry... I hate to admit it, but I voted for that sandal-kissing, sheik-screwing, meglaomania-driven, price-gouging, week-knee'd, profit-crazed, corporate, fachist, skull-bone card carrying, earth degrading, pillow-biting, ass-kissing, oil baron.

Now I KNOW I'm going to hell, but if there be any grace for me at all, I would like for it to be poured upon those who've been affected by my poor decisions in the voting booth.

Those who've been put out on the streets because the current administration has outsourced any job they could to foreign countries, gave tax incentives to large companies to move south of the border so they wouldn't have to pay their workers as much as they do here in the U.S. , thus driving their profit margins higher, without any concience what it may do to our economy here.

For those who, while they lived on the streets here, were getting a better chance at finding a job, or at least some food and a warm place to stay at night. And for those who were providing assistance to those who were in need with government grants.

For those who needed healthcare and got turned out of the hospital doors. And those who were climbing the ladder at their job for their merits, but lost out to those who were hired to fill a quota because of their race, ethnicity, heritage or handicap.

And for those quota fillers who couldn't get jobs based on their merits because the jobs were filled by those less qualified.

For those who live paycheck to paycheck without knowing if this Friday they'll have a paycheck thanks to all the taxes being taken by big government for special interests. And those who were hoping and counting on a fair Christmas bonus from their company who found out that their bosses got raises and the bonuses were being "phased out".

"My son, for this I stongly agree that you have sinned. But your sin lies within your own heart. Therefore, I won't give you any "Hail Mary's", but just One Act of Contrition."

Yes, Father- What is it?

"Vote Democrat next time."

And if I don't?

"Then all the Hail Mary's and Acts of Contrition I could give you wouldn't save your soul, and you may as well run for Congress."

I WILL vote Democrat for President next election. Nobody can change my mind about it, so don't write me about it.

(c) Anthony Huddleston




Posted by Tony on Wednesday, September 07, 2005 at 11:41 PM